- cross-posted to:
- programmer_humor@programming.dev
- cross-posted to:
- programmer_humor@programming.dev
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No it just makes me even more frustrated. The amount of incompetence and neglect I see and have to deal with on a daily basis, even with software developed by multi-million dollar corporations, is astonishing.
Why is modern webdev such a clusterfuck? Why does VisualStudio take multiple seconds to open an empty project? Why does Nvidia’s control panel have multiple seconds long pauses to switch between settings categories or loading lists? Why does this game run like garbage on a 4090 when it has mostly static environments and the graphics aren’t even that good?
I could go on but I’d be here all day. All of those things, with the exception of webdev (because god there’s so much shit in there…), could be easily fixed* or should’ve never gotten that bad in the first place.
*Provided the entire architecture isn’t garbage, otherwise see the rest of the sentence…
And I know much of it is not necessarily the fault of the devs, with management and deadlines preventing them from doing the best possible job, I myself was forced to release half broken updates a few times because of that, but they are not the only problem.
There’s a real problem in today’s programming culture with thinking that computers are so fast, any garbage code you write will be fast enough, or that you only need to optimize the hot path. Apply that philosophy throughout all your codebase, and suddenly there is no hot path, everything runs like shit. People should also actually learn how things work, not just frameworks, otherwise they won’t be able to make informed decisions about what they write.
Also stuff like “Clean Code” and other similarly dogmatic principles still permeate many of the codebases I see. Nigh implementable jungles of <10 lines long functions and OOP garbage that make working with everything a massive pain, other than making every function call virtual and thrashing performance. You need to maintain such a massive amount of context in your head just to figure out the flow of a particular piece of code, with the aid of a debugger because everything is done through abstract classes or interfaces, that even making the smallest change becomes a tedious and error prone task.
Also fuck dynamically typed languages. They suck, every single one of them.
I still complain about bugs, but instead of blaming devs or qa I blame managerial positions and stakeholders.
Huge bug in game exists:
Non dev gamers: “How didn’t they catch this blatant issue?”
Dev gamers: “How many times the issue was addressed just to be told to work on something else with greater priority like <random stupid thing>?”
I can code pretty well. I’m a qa tester. Complaining about videogames is my mostprechious pasttime
I must have learned programming wrong, then, because dear ducking god, the amount of incompetent shit I have to see is surreal.
One system we’ve got from a different state was marketed as having geolocation. It doesn’t. All object relations have to be created manually in a separate page, as in, you register a city, then register an address, THEN, on a different page, you connect the two. Now imagine this for some 24 objects. It has some specific profile permissions hard coded by id (like, only profile with id 4 can create some stuff)
This is just the shit I remember off the top of my head. The cherry on top is that they didn’t validate unique emails for users, you could have 999 users with the same email and no way for them to reset their passwords. I asked why: “we didn’t think about it”
This read like a movie review. I love movie reviews.
Don’t watch this movie! Died by the second half. My neighbors called SWAT on me cuz the movie script was that bad, the actors completely unlikable, and the direction almost nonexistent. The CGI was not bad if it was 1990s. There was almost no humorous scenes. Just wet paint dripping dialogue by actors that couldn’t fake an emotion or facial expression to save their life.
Every time a critic dies a little on the inside
Can’t get enough. The opener is always fresh and hilarious
Feel your pain there, my second and longest role was doing automated phone systems(IVR) and sadly Everytime I call another company I hear all of their fuckups
I asked why: “we didn’t think about it”
I have Simon Pegg in Hot Fuzz ringing in my ears: “IT’S YOUR JOB!”
I code and i ruthlessly bash devs
Oh i love you!
I seem to complain more, actually.
Seriously, every time I see null interpolated in a receipt or email I always think “you fucking donkeys”.
Dear {{ user.first_name }}, We would like to personally thank you for registering at {{ brand.name }}! Regards, {{ employee.name }}Like, it printing out “Null”?
Yeah
It’s a bell curve.
You won’t have time after spending all day complaining about bad documentation.
You mean missing documentation?
Tbh, while it is funny out-of-context, I encountered the same exact thing (and I can guaran-fuckin-tee the offender used copilot for this).
It’s not funny to be on the receiving end of this, ESPECIALLY in professional environment, where you should not react like that 😅
But sometimes it’s just what people need to get their shit together. People get too complacent sometimes, and when everyone has to deal with the consequences sometimes a little emphasis on how bad things are is necessary.
I agree, but would like to add I find AI generated code without thought or care put into understanding it more offensive than this to begin with.
Nah, I complain more about things. Especially ones that should work. “Oh you didn’t test this in my preferred browser and now it only works in Chrome, idiot”. I can see the error and I know why the shortcut was taken or the test that would have caught it was skipped and it pisses me off.
Sometimes it’s deadlines and outside forces and not laziness, and for those the coder is forgiven. And sometimes the bug is hilarious and not frustrating. But if you have an e-commerce site, basic utility, healthcare portal, or other required site that is broken because you couldn’t be arsed to test with something other chrome on a desktop monitor then fuck right off.
One of the things that pissed me off fierce was when my natural gas utility company redid their website, and got redirected to a landing page with an autoplaying video. Excuse me I’m already a customer, I want to spend twenty seconds paying my bill, not two minutes dealing with unnecessary crap someone thinks looks better or more trendy.
I am still complaining, but now I blame the managers
“wow, what director level ass pushed them so hard that they had to leave that bug in?”
I think of the T-pose all the time in cyberpunk, that was a bug that was horrible but obviously it was tracked somewhere, and some director was like “it’s fine, ship it”
Still stuck on FF15. So much time and energy invested in reinventing Unreal Engine… badly. Then they have to attack the corners of the actual story with a hacksaw to push a title seven years in development out the door half baked.
There was a Dead or Alive game in which a manager literally released it before it was ready without consulting with the team. The game was still in beta and a glitchy mess.
The PS2 version of DoA2? I vaguely recall reading about it, also how the Dreamcast version turned out to be the complete one.
Wrong.
ITT: Learn to code and you’ll never understand irony again!
Yeah, that’s something a shitty developer who is bad at debug would say.
Bugs frustrate me more because I can often guess at why they are happening and how to fix them but can’t just apply the fix myself. Even more frustrating when there’s an update and I’ll think, “oooh maybe they finally fixed that annoying bug!” and then see it again shortly after installing the update.
Sometimes what’s worse is when I am pretty sure something they suggest won’t fix the bug and then it does fix it. Like I experienced a race condition in my Android email app and talked to support about it. They said try clear app data / cache and see if it worked. I thought there is no way that would solve it and they’re just giving be the boilerplate support thing. It did fix it.
Now I’m even more scared at what their code is doing.
the dunning-bugger effect
“ugh I know exactly why this is happening” is such a frustrating feeling. Especially when it’s stuff that should’ve been found in testing, or that you know probably was found in testing, but they deprioritized the fix.
Bugs frustrate me more because I can often guess at why they are happening and how to fix them but can’t just apply the fix myself.
That’s like a big portion of bugs lmao, lots of bugs exist because the spaghettification of the code makes it too costly to fix. Do you really think devs don’t know why the bugs are there? They usually can’t be fixed because there is no time or no willingness from management or the root cause is so deeply rooted it requires a shit ton of work to be able to fix it at all.
Yeah that’s fair, though it doesn’t help with the frustration. Especially when it’s management getting in the way of things. Like with all the enshitification, my guess is that there’s a dev or team of devs that hate themselves for going along with it.
The DMR in call of duty years ago. “Here’s a bug with a gun that instakills from 4 miles away that breaks the game dynamics. It’s literally unplayable. Instead we added more features that make us money.”
If you learn to code, you learn that major bugs in releases are horrible and indicative of neglect.
In a professional sense my experience is that they’re more often the result of under-staffing and rigid, fixed release schedules.
And changing priorities and scope.
Yeah, it shouldn’t happen in a release. But, if I had a penny for every time I’ve seen the last minute development that wasn’t tested yet and not even due for the current release squeezed in. I’d literally have a pound, or dollar or whatever else has 100 pennies in.
or whatever else has 100 pennies in
Well it’d be 8 shillings, 4 pence, in pre-decimal British currency.
I sometimes suspect that the push for decimalisation was in part to avoid having to teach computers the old system.
Afaik it actually was, the UK wanted to move more financial calculations to computers and it was a lot easier to use a decimal currency for that
Programming a robust global date-time system and having a transparent conversation between metric and *imperial/traditional" units is just a warm-up to show that you can work with the truly demented currency system. Make sure everything is rounded off to the nearest whole ha’penny.
And sheer pigheaded stubbornness.
Yes. Generally, tons of major bugs in a production release are a sign of the company just not working right in general
Yeah, I learned to code almost 20 years ago in order to mod video games, and learned that many bugs and massive problems in mods and games are caused by coders being either extremely lazy or making extremely dumb decisions.
In general, a ginormous problem with basically all software is technical debt and spaghetti code making things roughly increase in inefficiency and unneccesarry, poorly documented complexity at the same rate as hardware advances in compute power.
Basically nobody ever refactors anything, its just bandaids upon bandaids upon bandaids, because a refactor only makes sense in a 1 or 2 year + timeframe, but basically all corporations only exist in a next quarter timeframe.
This Jack Forge guy is just, just starting to downslope from the peak of the dunning kruger graph of competence vs confidence.
Here’s a copy of that image without the watermarks
Didn’t even see the watermarks.
Thanks!
I unironically need glasses.
I start to appreciate games that implement complex and sometimes rarely noticeable (immersive, boo) mechanics that come off naturally. And I notice how a thought pattern behind bad ones could’ve progressed.
Bugs? My favs are buggy to the point some of these bugs became their own mechanics. I only get annoyed when the game bores me out, and if bugs can’t make me feel like it, it’s fine. And some better-done games are pretty boring to me.
Put four pots over the squares over the ground.
Shoot the dragon head statues, the pedestals raise.
The pedestals make stone grinding sounds and…
Only one pedestal has raised, the pots have caused the animation to bug out and the game engine to assume that the pedestal is in the final position on the floor.
The floor position has the lever locked.
The game developer never anticipated what a massive idiot I was
Bugs? My favs are buggy to the point some of these bugs became their own mechanics
This is pretty much half of competitive Brood War.
That’s the spirit.
Dying to a stupid bug is a great way to suddenly get frustrated though. Hard agree with you though, buggy games are my favorite. Especially small indie projects because I you can find the great bugs.
Dying to a bug in indie game can be so hilarious some youtubers in niche game communities got their rep from doing compilations of these. Case in point: PhanracK of WH:VT2 fame: https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=mGlWiMg3bUg
Have you got some like this to follow?
I don’t know any YouTubers other than “Let’s Game It Out”.
My fav game to speedrun is Neon Boost (free on Steam) because of several bugs I have found in the game. Otherwise a small boring indie platformer about rocket jumping is made fun (to me) through exploitation of its physics.
- Diagonal movement is faster (hold two adjacent directional keys). Sliding makes you even faster.
- Precise rocket jumps can receive more velocity than the developers intended, allowing you to skip many parts.
- You can touch the end of stage goal post from underneath the platform.
- You can wall jump off of the top of walls, allowing for many skips and time saves.
- You can get massive upwards velocity by sliding into a small couple-pixel ridge and jumping precisely once you touch it. This is possible on the starting platforms of all World 1 levels. It basically only improves individual level speedrun records, except on one level where you can skip the whole level and complete it in 1 second (an 9x faster than intended.
My crowning achievement was completing the final level of World 1 (1-12) in 18 seconds. The Devs expected a fastest time around 40 sec.
Sounds sick and right in my lane.
That’s not true - I’m complaining about the bugs in our software almost every day!
My favorite part is guessing what they do that results in the bug!
Right?? That’s one of my favorite aspects, like there’s a weird bug and you can kind of backtrack what happened like “Oh I wasn’t supposed to jump out of the car I had to walk through the precise path, I missed the trigger or something I guess??”
Learn to code and you’ll wonder how in the hell some bugs even got created
