Miles O'Brien

maximally profitable game

See, it really is just an algorithm that can be nailed down perfectly, and I’ve got an entire floor of statisticians and market analysts that agree it’ll make me berjillions!!!1!!

Lpt: they’re also telling me more statisticians and market analysts will help boost my numbers too! Jackpot!

-an executive, somewhere, in nearly every corporate office

Yeah, I had been holding on to one last one after selling the rest (I made a whopping $13 yaaaaaaaaay)

Selling that shit the moment I can get to my laptop.

Old people and overreacting to normal things because new ideas are scary and confusing

Name a more iconic duo

“the best city builder of 2024”

I mean, I like what they have so far but uh… It’s a pretty low bar, it’ll be hard to trip over…

Fun for what they have, but after maybe 10 hours you’ve played every aspect of the game. Each new game feels exactly like the game you just left. There isn’t much “design tweaking” you can do, and there isn’t much you can unlock that changes any gameplay.

Still, I have it with game pass and I keep it just in case something updates. It is fun to play. And you can disable the weird competitive features. This is a city builder, not call of duty. I don’t care to play against an opponent.

The first time I played that I was at the tail end of a marathon session from hyperfixating on the game.

I quit playing for a week because the cutscenes.

And of course beat it first try with no warm up when I came back…

Don’t use mods you don’t like. It’s quite the Shocker, I know.

Also don’t shit on other people for using mods you don’t like. Whether it’s the “intended experience” or not.

If I want to drive through Red Dead Redemption 2 in a lifted Nissan altima rocking light strips, spinners, and a massive spoiler, I shouldn’t have to deal with a thousand nerds telling me it’s not historically accurate or it “ruins the game”

(note: if someone knows of a car mod for rdr2 I’d actually like to use a car for the lols)

If someone wants to play skyrim with their massive dong hanging out of their chainmail bikini, while dual welding the keyblade and master sword to fight Gnasty Gnork then let them do that in peace.

Okay here’s the plan.

I gonna slam the door open, run straight in, and attack with the most basic of attacks I can think of.

It’s foolproof.

May I… Stand unshaken…

“…thank you…”

I’m not crying YOU’RE CRYING

Attorneys don’t just file a suit because their client said so: they generally need to be shown there’s an actionable case with a chance if winning

Man, I used to believe that.

The last 8 years have shown me otherwise.

News flash!

This, just in: “Leaders of capitalist meat grinders prepared to lie to keep money flowing and try to pull in more”

I’m shocked.

Oooh, nice interrobang.

My favorite part of control is how they go into juuuuuuust a little bit of explaining how things work in a science way, and sometimes you can almost feel how things are connected, and then it’s like “Yeah we have no fucking clue how any of this actually works, we’re just trying to keep it all from destroying the universe and keeping notes along the way.”

And then you meet the next thing that almost makes sense. Until it doesn’t.

I don’t remember if I ever finished AW but I do believe I have the disk around here somewhere. The control dlc definitely rekindled my interest.

Control was great

I love games that make me think outside the box

“hey let’s release the same thing over and over again, charge almost full game price for it, and whenever something new comes out, just delete everything they’ve already paid for.”

“hey why aren’t people continuing to buy our game…”

Yeah. Great mystery, that one.

Bungie will never get another dollar from me.

Part 1 is the first act

Oh my god I just now got what my sister meant by “the act break is super long” and why my mother replied “lol” in the family group chat.

Same.

I listened to the original Broadway cast so many times I was concerned I wouldn’t like a “cover” of it. After my sister said she liked it, and listening to a song and not finding it objectionable, I had even considered watching it.

This is the first I’ve heard of it being a two parter, so they hid it well. I’m surprised my sister didn’t say anything

Not a chance in hell I’m watching it until part two comes out in physical media so I can watch them both in one go. I hate breaking up the flow, even for a few hours while I wait for the next screening…

surely they’ll follow up with investments into US-produced solar equipment to boost the economy and bring prices down to competitive levels, right?

… Right?

… And?

Why do we give a shit?

Why is this newsworthy?

Are we going to hear about his time working in retail soon? I’m sure it will provide deep insight to find out which store he worked at for 3 months, 8 years ago. clearly that’s relevant information.

I see their junk at every thrift store and flea market in Ohio.

I legitimately thought they went out of business.

I think after years and years of 3d games, I just don’t like 2d anymore.

I’ve become institutionalized by a third dimension…

I don’t even enjoy Castlevania anymore and those games were my jam back in the day.